I am two days into being a single parent. My wife went to the US (we live in Brazil) for a week to visit her family and I have the two girls with me. And I have my parents here with me; which is plenty of help. But the girls miss their mom. I know that if she were to never come back my kids would get used to it, (and don't worry she IS coming back), but not having her makes a huge hole in our family. I can't imagine life without her.
Evelyn, Anna Claire and I have had some good quality time together the last couple of days. Their mom is their security blanket and I am needing to give a few more hugs, a few more bull rides and a few more stories in order to keep enough of that blanket around them so that they do not feel abandoned. No one can replace the feeling of a healthy family environment. It is no wonder we have so many crazy things happening in our world with the lack of secure families that exist.
I can't help but wonder how other families get along without a spouse. I know they do, but it has to be pretty difficult. The ruling this past week caused me to think more about our families. My first thoughts were "what did we expect?" The divorce rate in the US is terrible and in the churches is not much better. Families are often torn apart and the norm is having an abnormal family, which I guess would make the abnormal family being the normal family. We expect the nation to look to traditional marriage with respect when we have made it a joke.
Marriage is not easy. Sarah and I have experienced plenty of ups and downs and the "easy" reaction of the moment is to give up. The biblical response should be to love and fight for the marriage. Which is interesting because Christians all over are citing the Bible when it comes to defining marriage between a man and a woman, but ignoring the part about staying married. If we are going to make a big deal about the court ruling we need to make a big deal about the state of marriage in our churches.
God created marriage partly to understand Him better. The roles played by husband and wife or mother and father are completing roles that are beautiful to behold when they are played correctly. The trinity has roles as well that complement each other and cause us to marvel at the holiness of our God. The man and woman's responsibility in the marriage may not be the same, but it is of equal importance (well, maybe the mother's is a little more important). Distorting this truth has destroyed the idea of marriage. No one knows their roles anymore. It is no wonder that mixing up these roles has blurred the lines of marriage.
So my challenge to you is this; instead of criticizing the world for acting like the world, how about we make our own marriages and families enviable.